The Seeds of Belonging and the Beginnings of Identity
Debbie Laurin, PhD
Ruth Hammond stated that the way human culture is first conveyed to infants is quite literally in our hands. “The gentleness or roughness with which we lift, carry, and manipulate their bodies determines how willing they are to open themselves to us, and to the world, because we represent their world in the beginning, and we are their primary link to the rest of it.”
Through this first experience of contact a baby’s first sense of self is influenced by the behaviours of those who care for the child. Before an infant acquires language a scaffold of social interaction is built. What does this mean? Children need shared experiences with significant adults to develop interest in the objects and events of the world to nurture their emerging capacity to know other’s minds in an intersubjective way.
Gaze following has profound implications for both language and emotions. Babies are not just visually attracted to faces; they are motivated to perform actions that match those they see. They use these observations to make sense of the world, to identify what does and does not matter, and to construct their self identity and their concepts about others. Children begin to interpret caregiver emotional displays through shared gaze and how gaze is directed. For example, think of an emotional display you had in the presence of a young child. Do you recall the child’s reaction? Sometimes children will imitate the adult’s emotional display to make meaning of the event or object. Children pay attention to similarities and differences among the people in their lives. They are sensitive to the timing and quality of the adult’s responses, pausing, and rhythmical exchanges involving gaze and joint attention. Joint attention is profound from the perspective of human evolution since the capacity to share one’s perception with another is unique only to humans.
Joint attention occurs before first words of an infant and leads to shared meaning and the experience of another’s thoughts that are separate from one’s own. The game of Peek a Boo and other eye games are wonderful ways that babies experience you/me distinction with their caregivers in a playful, rhythmic, reciprocal way. Through this playful universal game, peek a Boo contributes to the development of 3rd person and 1st person awareness and a sense of belonging so vital for the emerging sense of self.
I (first person) see YOU (referring in the third person) Where is she? There you are!
Louise Derman-Sparks contributes decades of anti-bias research to early childhood education. She speaks to the role significant adults play in children’s lives in helping children feel either proud, shamed, or conflicted about their identities and about their attitudes toward human differences. Learning about social and personal identities begins in one’s family. However, messages from the larger society soon filter in and become a central influence. Crucial to supporting a child’s sense of identity is a willingness of important adults to examine their implicit and explicit attitudes and comments that positively or negatively influence belonging and the child’s blossoming sense of self.
References
Derman-Sparks, L., Edwards, J.O., & Goins, C.M. (2020). Anti-bias education for young children and ourselves. (2nd Ed.). National Association for the Education of Young Children. Washington, DC.
Hammond, R.A. (2009). Respecting babies: A new look at Magda Gerber’s RIE approach. Washington, DC. ZERO TO THREE.
Meltzoff, A. N., Moore, M. K. (1998). Infant intersubjectivity: broadening the dialogue to include imitation, identity and intention. In St. Braten (Ed.). Intersubjective Communication and Emotion in Early Ontogeny. Cambridge University Press.
Terrace, H.S. (2009, October 1). Becoming Human : Why two minds are better than one. http://vimeo.com754402